S/V L'ORIENT

Typical Mustique villas Michael Jagger...........known later as Mick.......was in Mustique yesterday (as were we). The island has only 90 houses on it (of which 45 can be rented) and less than 25 "hotel" rooms. Mustique has a distinctly un-Caribbean feel- as all the locals have been removed. The Mustique Company actually owns the island, and it is completely dedicated to tourism; extremely high-end tourism. It is a beautiful and extremely quiet island. The only Caribbean folks who stay on the island live in this lodging that looks creepily like slave quarters. Hedge fund guys, their girlfriends, and washed-up rockers bask in the sun, sequestered from regular tourist folk on "those other islands". Beachfront in Mustique We dinghied into Basil's Bar for sundowners and chatted up our server. "So, any celebrities here ?" He told us that Mick Jagger, Bryan Adams, and Shania Twain were currently on Mustique. Because we had heard a rumor to this e

So we're sitting on our boat, enjoying another perfect sunset here in Bequia. A rental catamaran is next to us with Canadians on it. Typical family vacation scene.........15 year old daughter is on the deck near the bow reading by herself. Son is in the cockpit playing a hand-held video game. Dad is bathing naked off the back.........WHAT ? Another 3-4 people are below. And he didn't just jump in and jump out.......he was taking his sweet time..........practically air drying. He was like 50 years old. I hope you're squirming in your chair now, remembering those weird looks you got as a kid from Uncle Ned. That's how uncomfortable it was. Our current anchorage in Bequia This is different than the 5:00 PM "washing hour" (formerly known to us as cocktail hour). All the yachties with cheap boats take turns bathing off the back of their boat in salt water because they don't have showers. The highlight yesterday was the nearby Belgian guy who took a pee of

We had been postponing this moment for a few days........hoping against hope that they'd go away.......or at least stop growing. It wasn't to be. So, our least favorite chore needed to be repeated. Barnacle busting. Every couple of weeks, these disgusting slug-like things start growing on the red hull stripe of our boat. The bottom paint of a boat generally protects against this type of growth. Problem is, the waterline and the bottom paint are not always level. Water splashes above the bottom paint, onto our beautiful red hull stripe. Water containing these alien-like crustaceans.  They grow like fingers off the boat, and have a light brown coloration...........totally gross. The only way to get them off is with a scrub-brush. The worst part is that you have to be in the water to do it. Why? Because of the shape of the boat, their favorite habitat is in a place that's more underneath the boat than on the side. So, armed with a scrub-brush, dobie pad and spo

I hate beggars. Here in the Eastern Caribbean, we meet a lot of them. Guys with new Reeboks, cool sunglasses, some gold electroplated jewelry. Everybody's got a pitch........a con. It's like a 1950s movies where guys in fedoras refer to each other as "Mac". Beggar- "Hey mahn, can I have $5 ?" Hold it. You've got nicer clothes than me (I definitely look "live-aboard" now)...........and you've made up your mind what denomination would be a suitable stipend for a citizen of your ilk ? Tom- (with Kirstin cringing) - "No, you can't. And just so we're clear, it's not that I can't help you..........it's just that I don't want to." Sometimes they are quite assertive. The other day, we're walking down the street to get groceries. A guy my age walks up, puts his arm around me and shakes my hand as I'm walking. Kind of like a soft-mugging. Beggar #2- "Hey, give me a minute........this is the Car

It's common knowledge in the blogosphere and all over the Caribbean that L'ORIENT, although posh and stylish..........is lightly armed. Until now. Until we purchased "The Peacemaker". During a fruit transaction with our dealer (Gregory) I indicated that I was looking for a WMD (weapon of mango destruction). "50 EC mahn" was his answer (that's about $20 US). I thought it was a lot but he's the only arms dealer who also sells passion fruit in the bay. Now I can open coconuts myself AND feel better at night. If we are ever boarded, we have a plan.  First, we blast our air horn (really loud). That's in our bedroom. We also have hornet spray......the kind that travels in a narrow beam 30 ft..........right in the eyes. It's stupid, but it makes both of us feel better knowing we have a machete too. I just hope I'm not going native, like Kurtz in "Apocalypse Now". Now we're ready for trouble.............make that looking for

Pitons from our mooring spot As you would imagine, Tom and I have a lot of time on our hands. So we tend to get fairly obsessive about things; like the Rolling Stones, for example. The boats anchored around us must marvel (or cringe) at the sheer length of time we can listen to the Stones greatest hits (purchased on itunes while anchored - thank you internet signal). Amazing music, still. Neither of us liked their music or really knew anything about the Stones before reading the Keith Richards book "Life". The boat at times seems like one big chattery book club, "Can you believe the amount and variety of drugs this guy took?" "How is he still alive?", etc. Because Tom spent much of his life on planes or waiting for planes, he has been a consistently voracious reader. I absolutely love to read but the average work week flew by with me still attempting to catch up on the Sunday New York Times; much less a book. We are both catching up now...We thank the

 Jah is God, to Rastafarians. One of the more amusing things we've seen here in the Eastern Caribbean are the ubiquitous bumper stickers on locally owned boats........"Jah is my copilot". From my vantage point, I doubt he'd ride with these guys for long before bailing out. Caribbean guys have a curious way they operate anything with an internal combustion engine. For them, there appears to be only two throttle settings........."Off" and "Full". You see it on the roads- with cars, trucks, motorcycles, scooters, and even mopeds moving at breathtaking pace over even the most treacherous, pockmarked roads. On the sea, the same applies. Even the humble Caribbean fisherman in his wooden longboat frequently has a 150 hp outboard roaring full out..............all the way up to the dock, when a sudden shift into reverse (at full throttle) stops the boat just before it takes out the pier. Oh, and they also frequently STAND UP in these boats while traveling

 Kirstin and I visited a sulphur spring pool here in Soufriere, St. Lucia yesterday. The site is beautiful, with a botanical garden path that leads right by the warm pools that we were enjoying. Cruise ships in St. Lucia use the site as well, which brings van loads of guests there. As we were enjoying one of the pools a large group of elderly guests came by led by their wise-cracking tour leader (a local guy about my age). These tour leaders are very tip dependent, so they try their best to be "Mr. Personality".........kind of a game-show host persona.......in order to endear themselves to the tourists and thus cash in at the end. As this young showman led his group past us, he quipped......."hey, what's that trail of bubbles behind you ?". Oh, I get it. A little potty humor for your guests to enjoy...........at my expense. OK, fella. Game on. He went on to announce (in his capacity as tour guide) that mineral spas help a variety of disorders like psoriasis, a

So Kirstin and I are standing at a marina bar in Rodney Bay, St. Lucia and a guy starts chatting us up. Very nice English dude, about my age. Well dressed, well spoken.........not ruling class, mind you- but a good guy nevertheless. He's 44, dating a 34 year old yoga instructor named Meg (secret high fives from male readers). Then it gets interesting. He knows St. Lucia quite well. He's in the middle of a 21 day stay..............why is he here ? Because he met Meg a few months ago in St. Lucia (the hotel employs her in the spa) and he liked her. So he came back, just to see her again (sounds like Hugh Grant's hopelessly smitten character right ?). Anyway, he's thinking about making some life changes. "Oh, really ?.......what kind ?". He went on to explain that he has quite a bit of time on his hands due to his business interests. He owns no fewer than 20 homes in Manchester which he rents out to students there. This produces quite a bit of cash and requires

At anchor the sound of a horn could mean one of several things: 1) a boat is about to collide with you 2) someone is trying to sell you something or, in the case of our boat, 3) Tom is in the bathroom. Just such an event happened this morning at the too early hour of 8am. I seem to hear a horn in the distance that is growing closer - given that Tom is next to me it (hopefully) isn't him, so that means it is an enterprising St. Lucian with something to sell. While some boaters absolutely hate vendors, Tom and I really aren't bothered by them and kind of enjoy the visit. Especially when the boat is pimped out like this. Gregory circles Rodney Bay selling fruit - today he offered a cornocopia of tropical fruits: papaya, mango, grapefruit, coconuts, bananas. All presented to you at the stern of your boat! We dressed and hustled on deck - now the fun begins.........we greeted him with a hearty "Wazzup". "Oh mahn.........I gots de best froot". We have a bit of

Kirstin is smiling ear to ear. She's not like many women I've encountered in my 48 years..........jewelry doesn't get her excited...........she likes shoes but doesn't over-spend...............she also hates shopping. Before every man reading this starts angling for her, I'll add that she doesn't like watching ESPN (nobody's perfect). But the thing that really gets her excited is Indian food. She's been to India, and lived in London (where a lot of fine Indian restaurants are, apparently) and has become an addict. We were blessed with some good options in DC and Annapolis but since we left she's gone into withdrawal. It's not for lack of trying. Up to now, she's been thwarted in the Caribbean. We've identified no less than 5 different Indian restaurants in our guidebooks only to find them closed and shuttered when we arrive. With each failure, my wife's seething increased........."I just don't understand why the Dominicans

So we're dinghying in today here in beautiful Rodney Bay, St. Lucia. As we approach the dinghy dock, an old man and his wife were rowing in. How cute ! I hope Kirstin and I are like that in 25 years. Or so I thought. We pass them as we are slowing down to tie to the dock. As we go by, the old woman (a less attractive Barbara Bush.......how about that for a visual) starts yelling at us. The man does too. I'm guessing that they feel like we should have let them get to the dock first so as not to create a wake in front of them. Like we have time for that. In all honesty, we were going almost as slow as them. As they arrive at the dock moments after us, her verbal abuse (in French) continued. Finally, I thundered back at them as I walked towards them........."Did you want us to go back to America and wait for you to get in ?" Now the training my company has given me in reading people comes in handy. But instead of using it for good (selling things), I can now use it

We've arrived in St. Lucia. What should we do for dinner ? Hmmm. No need to break the seal on our original propane tank (still full, as it was on Oct 15 of last year when we bought it). Plus, if we ever cranked on the oven in the boat, it might melt the directions which are no doubt still taped to the inside. So, of course, we went to shore in search of a restaurant. The people watching was fabulous. Of course naming people sitting around us is a time honored ceremony. "Parrot-face", "Plain Jane from Janesville, WI", "Sonny Bono"............they were all entertaining........but couldn't take top honors this night. We ate (and drank) at the bar. Our server was enjoying her first day of working there. Recipe for disaster right ? Instead, Fabienne was quite chatty. As she bonded with Kirstin, admittedly I began tuning out. Highlights of a Premier League match were being shown on a legit-sized bar TV so I was dividing my limited brain-cells between

One amazing thing about sailing is that the ocean is one vast road with relatively few people on it. The possibilities seem limitless. But there's a catch. Unlike driving a car (where you don't care what's under the asphalt), you definitely care what's under the water..........and you pray it's more water. Sometimes, Neptune disappoints. Case in point.........this sailboat seems to have misread his chart. The channel probably looked wide open at 6:00 PM.........probably coming in hot........thinking about his/her first Manhattan........maybe some chili-dogs.....and BAM..... right into a reef. Boat totaled..........insurance company citing the "gross negligence" clause as reason not to pay...........no chili-dog for you, you two-bit so-and-so. This actually happens a lot. Between running into other boats, not anchoring properly, and running aground, the loss rate on yachts is very high. Charter companies have come up with ingenious ways to quickly re

We've lived in the Caribbean for 100 days. We're hardly experts, but after this much time sailing around, you do develop stereotypes..................which I think are good. After all, getting to know everyone would be completely exhausting. Why not create nice rules and cubby-holes in which to put people based on largely superficial information ? So here goes.......... The French- largely jacked-up old boats with obvious existential flaws.........broken rigging, torn sails, etc. Probably good wine aboard..........some diver will retrieve it off the bottom in a few years. The Brits- wow. The spirit of Sir Edmund Hillary lives. They go off sailing in small, small boats. How small ? We saw these two 20 somethings that crossed the pond in a 28 foot boat with a 1930s outboard. The Germans- just what you think.........eclectic boats that are well organized and unisex......i.e. 10 guys packed into a 40 ft boat. The Dutch- you'll think I'm making this up but we'v

What do we do with our time ? I often wonder that as well. Today we sailed from Grand Anse to Le Marin (Martinique). Great sail. We looked at sea critters.........trimmed the sails........oh, and attempted to see how long you could talk in song lyrics before the other recognized it. Tom- Borderline...........you know I'm starting to lose my mind...........you just keep on taking my love over the borderline (Madonna) Kirstin- what ? (at first not listening)........then..........OK, Madonna.....got it. This goes on for a while to ever more obscure songs and references..............it ends with "Bitch better have my money" by Ludicris We also had a killer backgammon tournament last night...........Kirstin, being midwestern, loves all board games..........it was fun munching on coconut cookies and chocolate flavored rum while winning 3 of 4 games (2 on the last move).............problem is, that given our unlimited time and zero responsibility, the tournament resumes

Screw's Sulphur Spring - Dominica As Kirstin and I cruised out of Roseau, Dominica and headed for Martinique we both had quizzical looks on our faces. What had we just seen ? Dominica is an island of impossible natural beauty. Mountains wild with parrots and other creatures..........waterfalls, nature trails, hot springs........in short, everything you could want from a vacation. The grim statistics ? Only 55,000 tourists visited Dominica in 2008; fewer than visited Haiti. (Are you kidding me ?) It's true. We wonder why. A few reasons come to mind. Dominica has no connection to a colonial power (i.e. France, UK) that could develop a tourism infrastructure. The population also seems ambivalent to tourists in general. School bus crushed during hurricane... in 1978 We loved it, although truthfully we would not venture out too far in Roseau. In Portsmouth (in the north), we wanted to party but it seemed that despite some 50 yachties in the bay, we were partying virtually

Hello from beautiful Martinique. Kirstin and I had a great sail here and are sipping wine in a bar. Why not on our boat ? No internet signal. How can Dominica, an island characterized by it's lack of development and sketchy gangsta population (at least in Roseau) have wifi to die for and Martinique be virtually computerless ? Anyway.........as we were concluding our stressful day on the beach reading from our Kindles, we walked to the dinghy dock. Ahead, I saw people all around (and in ) our dinghy. OK- I have very few hot buttons that make me homicidal.........threaten family and you're dead..........threaten me and you're dead.........and don't mess with Crabby.   These local 12-14 year olds were playing on and lounging in Crabby. That's my $5000 to replace dinghy. My blood pressure rose to unprecedented levels as I galloped toward the dinghy dock.......faintly hearing Kirstin's pleas not to kill the kids.  I got there before her and I was startled by the i

Wow. Profound sadness as we realize that this adventure is already 1/4 over (but that does mean we have 75% left!). Curses !!! We've visited 17 islands so far.........sailed about 2200 miles..........drank 211 bottles of wine (kidding..........I hope). Anyway, in no particular order are my 5 favorite aspects of this trip so far...... 1) The boat has been great. The conveniences (clothes washer, watermaker, refrigeration, etc), the technology (internet almost everywhere, cellphone, sat phone, 3 computers)......everything working well so far. I'm sure we'll never be seen again because of this post. 2) Sailing at night. What a rush.........the wind, waves........the spooky beauty of the sea and stars at night. We actually try to plan full-moon sails just because of how amazing it is. 3) Meeting interesting people.........like Hendrik and Arja, our Finnish friends. Hendrik is a folk singer (club quality) and gave us a private concert. Forgot how much I liked 70s folk rock